I recently went through a big change in my life. Going through a few days of grieving; I was thinking I had to start all over again. Overall, I was not feeling very good about it. Thinking on this and seeking spiritual guidance led me to a change of heart. Realizing that, no this is not a step back or even a do-over, this was a step forward. Even though my circumstance had changed, it was not necessarily a step back. Once I firmly established this thought I began to feel empowered.


Is this just a matter of semantics? No, not at all. The first way of thinking I described definitely had undertones of helplessness. “Whoa me, I have to start all over!” Instead, I began to feel empowered by knowing that I was stepping forward with a new beginning. Maybe they were baby steps but they still got me moving ahead in a positive direction. The first description was a form of being in a victim role and the other was a role of embracing change. Can you feel the difference in energy, or the energy shift that I made?


It can be easy in times of difficulty or stress to discover that we have allowed ourselves to wallow in the energy of victimhood. But with practice we all can learn to shift from the role of victim to one of empowerment. It does take practice like I said but more than anything it takes an increase of awareness as to what role we may be in.


Use these 14 identifiers to see where you are in these roles:


In the role of victim:

  1. You may have dissociated from your feelings and have very little awareness you are here.
  2. You are feeling sorry for yourself.
  3. You allow others to tell you what is good for you and what you should do.
  4. You may compound this feeling by looking for instances to reinforce your victimhood. “These things keep happening so I must not be meant to be happy”.
  5. Your energy is low and you engage in self defeating and destructive behaviors (over eating, drinking, increased TV time, either too much or too little sleep).
  6. You avoid activities and people you enjoy.
  7. You have trouble finding positive solutions to even the simplest of issues.


In the role of empowerment:

  1. You are in touch with your spiritual guidance and tap into your positive support system.
  2. You begin to feel powerful due to positive actions being taken.
  3. You listen to your support but feel strong to actively make your own choices.
  4. You easily begin to see that many positive things are right in front of you.
  5. You become excited and energized.
  6. You do things to reinforce your positive feeling.
  7. You easily are able to find alternative solutions to suit your circumstances.


The power of thought and word leads to the power of emotion and action. In a way this reminds me of one of my favorite childhood stories called, “The little engine that could”. Taking an example from this story my new mantra will be from the thought, “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can”. To the belief, “I know I can, I know I can, and I am glad I did!”


One Response to “The power of thought and word”

  1. Teresa, I found this so moving. So glad you found your center again, because the work you do in the world is so important. I’m going to print these lists out and post them where I can see them, as a reminder.

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